Back on my back

After a respite of pain and sick for a week I am back to being couch bound. bleh. Scary and bad news, I am temporarily having to stop my treatment because my liver is not doing so hot. =( It is hard to have to stop when I just got started again but I need to remember it will be about 3-5 years of this before I see any true light....I am coming up on 5 years of already being really sick now and with treatment that will be 10 years of my life, if I am one of the lucky ones that can beat this into remission, and I just need a break from the pain and sick ick. My 3 year old had her first serious jarisch herxheimer reaction last night at 1am and it was very, very scary; Her temperature dropped down to 95.6 for a few hours too. Until the last few weeks she has been doing amazingly well with her treatment but started to have mild herxing for the last 3 weeks which basically was an increase in the symptoms she has had since birth. Yesterday she got really sick and then whammo, middle of the night, we started almost convulsing (pulling her arms and legs to her chest and thrusting them out over and over), drenched in sweet but freezing cold. Her skin went chalk white and her eyes looked bruised. She kept moaning and scream/crying saying "NO, NO, NO!" and that her knees were hurting her. We temporarily stopped the antibiotics to let her system calm down and she is doing much better today. I am I am so grateful and relieved that the herx didn't get any worse. The thought of her going through the death-throe-ER-visit herxes that I do makes me sick to my stomach. She is so little and there is nothing I can really do to ease her discomfort or fear. Blah...bad night, very tired today. =(